Ok, so this is a little long, but I will try to get the point across in a brief space!
My friend had gastric bypass surgery. She wants to run a marathon in honor of her losing over 100 lbs. However, she wanted me (the "athlete") to run it with her, so she would be more motivated and things are always easier with a friend. Well, after debating, being negative and hating myself, I felt obligated to give her her wish. So, I am two weeks into training for a marathon that we will run February 15th. (What a way to spend valentine's right???)
So come Wed, I am having the most horrible day of my life. My children were all moody, cranky and crying; I was moody, cranky and crying. I do say I was at the bottom of the barrel. And at that point, a barrel would have been nice! I was fighting with Big J- and my kids, it was awful.
Finally at 7:15 I decide to go run to get my running in for the day. (yes, I did not feel like showing my redened madened face in public at church.) As I go outside, dreading the heat and the running, Big J- tells me I better run then b/c it is going to rain soon. I take off doing my timing and working on all that we are supposed to for our "training." I round the corner of our street and yep - raindrops; fast, hard, many raindrops. "God, what are you doing to me, I was already down, did you have to add rain?" I dig down deep and remember them saying at our meeting, we will run in rain, sleet, snow; we must train. "OK, God, I am in training. I am determined. I will run the race. I will fight the fight, but God, I am down and I need you to do this. I have nothing left in me and I am beaten. You will have to get me through this!" I make it around the corner of our subdivision and I look up in the sky and see it - a promise, just beaming beautifully at me. The biggest, brightest rainbow I have ever seen in my life. "Ok, Amy, I am here. You are not alone, I will never leave you. I will carry you and I will get you to the finish life. It will be ok, and the sun will shine tomorrow. I promise!"
Oh, I have never felt such peace in life. It was a different peace. I ran the rest of my time and just focused. I couldn't listen to my music, I couldn't look at the houses and my watch, I just looked straight ahead and focused. This has so much more meaning than the marathon. I just had to be training for the marathon to see that I was at my bottom or I would have never seen His promise. This is our spiritual walk: testing, obedience, endurance, questioning, recognizing, hitting the bottom and in the end - peace in being lifted up.
If you have been keeping up with my blog, you know how God has been at work in my life. You know that he transforming me and "training" me. All I have to do, is stay on course and run the race and follow through with my training. How awesome is that? He has made a promise!